Friday, November 25, 2011

Black Friday Sale to Save Kelsey's Heart





My Etsy shop is currently having a 50%, yes, 50% off sale. This goes all weekend. Proceeds are going to benefit Save Kelsey's Heart. Use the code BLACKFRIDAY to get the discount.


Here is Kelsey's explanation of the situation:

When I was born, I started turning blue (known as cyanosis). My mother’s doctor in Denison had me care-flighted to Medical City. Once there, they sent me to Children’s Medical Center. They did tests and concluded that I was born with a congenital heart defect known as Tetralogy of Fallot. The word “tetralogy” indicates that there are four abnormalities when ToF is present. Two of my main problems were that the valve used to pump blood to my outer extremities was missing, and I had a hole in my heart. I had my first surgery on October 13, 1990, when I was barely one day old. The doctors put in a temporary shunt to basically keep me from dying until I could have a total repair surgery. They said that they did not want to operate on a newborn heart unless it was absolutely necessary. I had my open heart surgery to repair the birth defect on January 31, 1992, when I was fifteen months old.

Babies who are born with ToF are supposed to have regular check-ups done by a cardiologist, usually every eighteen months or so. During the course of my life, my parents gained and lost insurance due to their income. While I was still covered, however, my cardiologist told my parents that I would probably need the valve that was constructed for me replaced when my heart reached adult size, because the valve would not grow with the heart, thus not allowing the heart to pump properly. According to the American Heart Association, “Some long-term problems can include leftover or worsening obstruction between the right pumping chamber and the lung arteries. Another problem can be a leaky pulmonary valve and enlargement of the heart’s right side. Patients with repaired Tetralogy of Fallot have a higher risk of heart rhythm disturbances called arrhythmias. Sometimes these may cause dizziness or fainting.”

In 2007, I was without insurance and started having symptoms concurrent to those attributed to patients whose valves had been repaired initially and were beginning to malfunction as described above once they entered adulthood. I voluntarily went a local emergency room, but nothing was done. I also visited my former pediatrician in 2008, who suggested that I see a cardiologist on the grounds that he suspected that I had acute ventricular tachycardia. However, I was again unable to see a cardiologist for lack of funds.

I dealt with these issues up until early 2011. In April, I had to be taken to the emergency room by ambulance because I could not breathe, walk, or talk, and my heart felt like it was quivering and skipping beats. Once there, they put me on an EKG machine and gave me a halter monitor to wear for a few days, which would then supposedly be analyzed by a cardiologist, but yet again, there was no way to see a cardiologist because I could not afford it. After this, I visited a local general physician at a clinic that has a fixed rate for all doctor’s visits. He diagnosed me with tachycardia and angina, simply from my descriptions, because he could not “catch it” with his stethoscope. No additional tests were done. Again, I was told that I needed to see a cardiologist, because he could not do more for me, as he was not a specialist in that area. He informed me, however, that he strongly believed that it had to do with the valve that I had replaced when I was fifteen months old, and that I should see a cardiologist soon. I told him that I had no insurance and no way to pay to see a cardiologist, and he gave me a prescription for a beta-blocker, that acted as an anti-arrhythmia medication. It helped for a while, but when my prescription ran out, the doctor refused to refill it.

My symptoms are getting progressively worse and I have been forced to quit college and stop working, because the strain is too much on my heart. I am getting denied insurance coverage by every company that I apply to because of my pre-existing conditions. I can no longer do simple, everyday tasks such as laundry or grocery shopping, because these “attacks” happen more severely and more frequently when I am active. However, they also happen when I am at rest; sitting in a chair or lying in bed. I feel as if I will pass out, and sometimes I do black out for a few seconds, my heart sort of shakes and quivers and seems to skip beats and I cannot breathe without gasping for air. I turned twenty-one years old on October 12, 2011.

There are a lot of causes out there, but this one is very important for me. She's only a few days younger than me but that's way too young. Without this surgery she will die. With it she will live. I like a clear-cut case once in a while. Also, what better way for me to mend a metaphorical hole in my heart than play a role in saving a woman with a literal hole in her heart?

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Seller in Need

Wick'd Creation makes cool shaped and scented soaps and jewelry. FRIENDS20 will get you a 20% discount at checkout. I would buy from her myself if I were not trying to break my shopping compulsions and not spending non-essential money for the next month.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Persona Poem for Creative Writing

My therapist said they are delusions,

these ghosts that I believe haunt me

and that the “names” I hear whispered

are merely a child’s way of labeling the unknown.

Still, I cannot stop running, cramming my mouth

full of yellow cupcakes and fruit, yet never feeling full,

all food in sight devoured, making myself sick,

to calm me, to help me buffer the dread, give me fuel

to escape, to fly from them, the four neon ghosts

that meander through the maze of my life.

My wife suffers just as I;

differentiated only by clothing, not fate -

(she’s worn the same bow in her hair for longer than I can remember)

our estrangement from dual anguish tearing us apart,

even as our perditions are so similar.

We are trapped in our own labyrinths of darkness

trying to escape our personal hells, our Minotaurs,

our four private Horsemen of our own Apocalypse:

Inky, Binky, Pinky, and Clyde.

Saturday, November 5, 2011

NaNoWriMo Day 5

New official song for Seasons Four Behind Closed Doors: "All Arise" by The Decemberists.

Mood: Hungry, tired, a little depressed, but also reasonably content.

Craft Show: Success. Tiring. Made $60, had a fun time chatting with my good friend who was working as shop assistant.

Write-In: Did not make it; was too exhausted from craft show.

To Do: Have snack, go to bed.

Friday, November 4, 2011

NaNoWriMo Day 4

I wouldn't have made it to class today without playing "Heartlines" by Florence + The Machine on repeat and listening to it as I walked. Made it a little late, but at least I made it. Pushing on through. NaNo is one of the brighter spots in my life right now, actually, aside from my wonderful loved ones of course, readers of this blog included. 6503 words so far.

Open query: I don't have a song that suits the novel as well as "July, July!" by The Decemberists, but it's still an awkward fit. Any suggestions? Thanks.

Thursday, November 3, 2011

NaNoWriMo Day 3

Up to 5400 words now, and in Chapter 2. Much enjoying the comments. NaNo seriously came for me just in time, because it gives me something positive to distract me from the rough time, moodwise, that I've been having lately. It's kept me out of a lot of trouble and given me an important thing to get up for in the morning. So I'm glad of that. I wish I didn't have to do my Chinese workbook now, though.

Ooh, and a bunch of my friends are doing a write-in party at an apartment this Saturday, so that'll be nice. And I have a craft show earlier in the day. Positive things. Just keep swimming.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

NaNoWriMo Day 2

Up to 4022 words as of now, and I really should do some homework. I've been functioning at only partial capacity due to this most recent bout of depression, but I'm working on that, and the writing really seems to be helping.

Additional fuel for the writing is Sour Patch Kids and listening to the most recent album by Florence + The Machine, Ceremonials, as well as my motley playlist of other songs when I need a break from that. I've decided, however, that my official theme song for Seasons Four Behind Closed Doors is "July, July!" by The Decemberists, which is appropriate since Seasons Four Open the Door was matched perfectly with their "Calamity Song". I will probably make a book trailer for it, either when I'm done or when I'm staving off another wave of causeless sorrow.

Many of my buddies are ahead of me. Grr. But I'm above par, so I'll sign off for tonight.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

NaNoWriMo Day 1

It has begun! I eagerly awaited midnight, fortified with orange Izzes and pumpkin bread and apples, and wrote 1358 words before I went to bed around two-ish. I am now at 1720, as you can see by the screenshot. I have a special playlist, I got a lap desk to improve the ergonomics of my marathon typing sessions, a bunch of my friends are doing it too, and I'm super-excited. I feel like I'm kindling the forest fire again. And I plan on blogging at least every day about my experiences.

The novel itself is being posted on my tumblr; if you don't know what my tumblr is you are welcome to ask on Facebook and I will privately message it to you if you are over 18 years old.

Stay tuned for more.